the mother-baby dyad — a singular unit

our babies have one job — and that is to fit in with the tribe.

ancestrally speaking, survival depended upon it.

if someone deviated too far from actions or behavior or the group, they risked exile or abandonment.

so what do our babies do? they mirror their most stable co-regulator, which is typically, you guessed it, mom.

of course there was the birth of the baby in this season, but why aren’t we talking more about the birth of the mother?

of the one who just navigated this wildly expansive, open season of life who is now navigating what may feel like the opposite in postpartum?

the mother-baby dyad is meant to venture on this path together. mirroring one another to go from a place of flexion, protection, and vulnerability, to a posturing and way of being that reflects resourcefulness, openness, buoyancy, resilience, and adaptability.

when mom is grounded, resourced, regulated, she is able to hold one her of a container for baby to step into her healing potential. 

so when mom is just a couple steps ahead and has found her footing within the birth of this new self, she provides an impeccable home base from which baby can feel stable, from which baby can mirror, from which they can productively co-regulate.

a feed-forward loop of ease, safety, space, and support.

we get a say in what kind of mirror we present for our children.

the village that rallies around our new families and holds our mothers is imperative in this dynamic. we aren’t meant to do this alone, nor is any one person meant to hold all of the answers. but if you are looking for a launch pad for you and your family and creating more productive co-regulatory mechanisms, a great place to start is by allowing yourself, mama, to be taken care of, held, and nurtured.

your baby is wise. he or she will follow suit 💓